My Report Card

I’ve always said that your elementary school report cards are an interesting portal into your early psyche…oooo, sounds ominous, doesn’t it?  But what I mean, is that looking back on your grades and your teacher comments, it’s a good way to step outside yourself and see the behaviors you exhibited as a child. 

I looked at my 5th Grade report card….and as I’ve joked with my friends, it’s pretty clear I was having issues.

According to all my checkmarks, I:
Don’t respect authority (at times talks back)
Don’t show self control (quite talkative….that shows lack of self-control??)
Don’t cooperate with teachers and classmates
Don’t accept criticism in good spirit (umm, no, I’m a kid, what do you want from me)
Purposely disturbs others (from what, a nap?)
Don’t make good use of time (just sometimes….so SOMETIMES I do!)

C for the grade in conduct.  C was satisfactory.  With all those comments I should’ve gotten a D or an E (no F’s on this here grading scale).  Maybe they should’ve just strapped me to the monkey bars and let me swing and screech my way through reccess – I was obviously a feral child.

The written comments are even more solicitous.  Those to post next time!