Liz Esquirol

Get “Out”

Get Out. It sounds negative but using the Buddha Balboa table-turning-technique, let’s look at it closely.

Let’s flip looking inward to looking outward (as one recent BB commenter advised.) We spend a lot of time looking inside ourselves trying to understand who we are and why we do the things we do. Yes – this is extremely valuable. BUT, perhaps we need to pair it with looking OUTWARD at the immediate world around us – and how we can contribute in a positive way. Does this not make for a more well-adjusted person?

In service to others – whether it be our family, our community, our schools, or even through work with organizations halfway around the world, are we not growing our internal selves? Getting out of our own heads and putting outside our personal problems or desires momentarily can release us from this narcissistic self-indulgent culture we’ve created. It free’s us from the “me” and allows us to embrace the “we.”

Don’t misunderstand what I’m saying – we need to look inside to see ourselves. But in the table turn, we need to get outside ourselves and see others…for what they need and for how we can be of help.

Maybe we just need to spend a little less time chasing our own tails and a lot more time wagging them. – BB

Two Cents Tuesday

Self-Improvement for Dummies

It’s Two Cents Tuesday….

I was at Barnes and Noble recently and I beelined to one of my favorite areas to browse -the “Self-Improvement” section. Not Self-Help, but Self-Improvement (that is how the B&N folks catalog this category.) I guess the heading Self-Help sounds too desperate. Improvement sounds uplifting and doable – like Home Improvement…”How to Fix Your Life with a Ladder and Hammer” – now that’s a book I can get behind. (Not a real title, but I may consider writing it.)

I mostly love these books because I’m a researcher but also because they make me smile with their claims to improve me, make me happier, richer, smarter, and more lovable. Really?

Happiness.

How many titles are there for books on happiness? Thousands…and thousands more. Happy – 5 letters that cause so much human concern – to achieve this “state” of happiness. I can save all of us a TON of money by saying quite simply, happiness is not a state you achieve or destination you arrive at – it is a feeling, an emotion that sweeps over you, at moments…it is not a consistent mindset or a plastered smile across one’s face (that would be creepy)…it is just one piece of the emotional pie.

Here are some actual titles on the shelves:

14,000 Things to Be Happy About
365 Ways to Live Happy
Happy For No Reason (pretty much sums it up, no?)
The Happy Book
Authentic Happiness
Choosing Happiness
Choose to Be Happy (lots of choosing going on)
Stumbling on Happiness
Happy – Simple Steps for Getting the Life You Want
A Short Guide to a Happy Life
How to Be Happy, Dammit (I guess you can be angry AND happy)

Beyond happiness, there are titles about Power…

Hidden Power
Tapping the Power Within
The Power of Intention
Unlimited Power

And a plethora of titles to help “improve” you even more….

1,001 Ways to Live in the Moment
What French Women Know
The Courage to Be Brilliant
Mojo Makeover: 4 Weeks to a Sexier You
Quiet Your Mind
59 Seconds – Change Your Life in Under a Minute (now this I gotta see!)
Live More, Want Less
Emotional Bullshit
Change or Die (not pulling any punches here)
Practical Intuition
A Gold Digger’s Guide (yes, this title was there)
Living Deeply (where? in a well?)
10 Stupid Things Women Do To Mess Up Their Lives
Get Out of Your Own Way
Life After Cigarettes
Think and Grow Rich (if it were that simple, we would all “think” a lot more)
Keep Your Brain Alive (good thinkin’)

And this awesome Pulitzer-Prize winning title by Shannen Doherty “Badass: A Hard- Earned Guide to Living Life With Style and (the Right) Attitude.” With style and attitude – a guide from the self-proclaimed Badass herself….hmm, I will be sure to put that on the top of my reading list.

Again…really??
Next to the four Improvement shelves, are three shelves for Psychology, two for Relationships, one for Sexuality and one for Addiction/Recovery. Lots and lots of reading to be done.

But – my very FAVORITE was seeing the “For Dummies” series in the Psychology section:

Schizophrenia For Dummies
Borderline Personality Disorder For Dummies
Overcoming Anxiety For Dummies
Bipolar Disorder For Dummies
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder For Dummies
Depression For Dummies (what’s in here – Hey, snap out of it you lug!)
Anger Management For Dummies
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder For Dummies

I don’t know about you, but I prefer my psychologist or therapist to have degrees lining their walls – not the For Dummies collection on their bookshelves. Schizophrenia for Dummies??? Sounds like a bad documentary on the life of a ventriloquist. And I’m not really sure these encyclopedias can cure my bipolar disorder or quell the anger rising up in me at just the thought of these books.

I’m not making fun…I’m just shocked…well, slightly. I need to take a deep breath…I’m sure there is a book on one of these shelves that can bring me back to my zen state….oh yes, see books on Happiness above.

Just my two copper coins for today. – BB

Uncategorized

G is for Grump

It’s just plain okay to be grumpy once in a while. Give yourself permission.

Why do I say this? Because we all feel it sometimes. Even though positive soup runs through my veins, some days I feel just a little bit “off.” Not sure why. It could be I didn’t have enough sleep, or somethings weighing on my mind, or it could be I’m just feeling sorry for myself because I’m not where I want to be.

So instead of fighting it and getting even more grouchy, I just accept it’s my current state of being. It’s alright to let it just circle around a bit, like a plane in a holding pattern, until you get confirmation from your inner air traffic control that it can land. In other words, let it run its course.

Even grumpy, you’re wonderful. – BB

TBIF (Thank Buddha It's Friday)

Onward Ho!

pro·gress verbprə-ˈgres

Definition of PROGRESS

intransitive verb

1

: to move forward : proceed

2

: to develop to a higher, better, or more advanced stage

TBIF #2: Progress

As we wrap up the calendar work week, let’s reflect on progress. There’s just nothing like the FEELING progress provides. It is the act of moving forward, no matter how fast or slow, that keeps we crazy human beings happy. Yes, happiness and progress go hand in hand.

We need this feeling that progress brings – it makes us feel worthy, hopeful and excited. It helps keep us inspired. Progress, in all its forms, makes us believe in our project, purpose and in ourselves.

Just think about it – think back on a time when you made some sort of advancement – in a home improvement project, in that quarterly report at work, in your diet program, or in your personal development….didn’t it make you feel good? Didn’t it make you feel (again, even if it’s in a very small way) proud of yourself? Because it should. And you know why? Because every step you make forward is valuable and impressive.

It reminds me of the funny quote “Even a kick in the ass is a step forward.” Now that’s a Buddha Balboa attitude!

Who knew that progress meant so much? Journey on my friends. – BB