Love Archives - Liz Esquirol

In the Wake of Valentine

(I wrote this piece a number of years ago…and thought it worth sharing here.)

The flowers are wilted. The chocolate is devoured. The lingerie is put back in the drawer. The credit card bill for dinner has not yet arrived. These are the days of Valentine’s Aftermath.

We can all breathe a sigh of relief now that the red-hearted day is done. No more pressure to buy your loved one the right gift or to score impossible reservations at the finest restaurant. No more florist price gouging on long stemmed red roses. No more guys sweating out the 24 hours where they have to look googly-eyed and profess their undying love. That’s all gone now. Everyone can resume their normal relationship temperaments filled with banal chatter and petty arguments.

Quotables

Book of Days #5

February 14

It does seem to me more and more that love has no value in itself or by itself (except perhaps first love, to the young). People talk about love as though it were something you could give, like an armful of flowers. And a lot of people give love like that – just dump it down on top of you, a useless strong-scented burden. I don’t think it is anything that you can give, or if you can, it is valueless. Love is a force in you that enables you to give other things. It is the motivating power. It enables you to give strength and power and freedom and peace to another person. It is not a result; it is a cause. It is not a product; it produces. It is a power, like money or steam or electricity. It is valueless unless you can give something else by means of it.

–Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Locked Rooms and Open Doors

Entertain

What do you love?

On this pre-Valentine’s Day Eve, I’m thinking of love in a different context…not that of romantic love, but of things that I love…things that make my heart beat a little faster.

I love music. I love how it makes me feel. I love the way it can make us smile, or move us to tears.

I love pizza. Yes, I love a food item. I love the taste, the texture, the variety. I love that it’s iconic and universal. I love that it’s cheap, quick and easy – and satisfying.

I love learning. I love researching and gathering new information.

I love dinner parties.

I love love love the beach. The smell of the air, the sound of the waves, the warmth of the sun.

Buddha Balboa

V-Day

Author: Bagande (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

No matter how you present it, Valentine’s Day is a mixed box.

And not just of chocolates.

It’s a polarizing Hallmark holiday that causes pressure, excitement or sadness. It divides the have and have-nots…it’s like the proverbial daisy petal-pulling, “he loves me, he loves me not”….leaving some with nothing but a stem.

Although I am a big romantic at heart, I’m also understanding that romance and love isn’t a day on the calendar. It isn’t about getting in line with florist industry or the chocolatiers. It’s about caring. It’s about expressing love in small ways. It’s about loving someone even when they aren’t being so lovable.

I dislike the exclusionary factor that Valentine’s brings. That somehow those who don’t have a sweetheart or those that aren’t falling into bed in bliss are “missing out” or for lack of a better term, “lacking.” They aren’t.

Those who didn’t receive flowers or cards today are just as lovable as the rest of us. There are lots of folks out there just giving the gifts or making dinner reservations because they feel they “have to” and not out of a genuine expression of what they truly feel. I get that. Sometimes that’s just the way things are.

But no matter what side you fall on in this red mania, it doesn’t matter. Because Valentine’s Day isn’t about a day. It’s a reminder to me, and should be to us all, that what we truly want is pure and simple….we want to be loved.

My gift today, if you’ll allow me, is to tell you that you are loved. And wanted. And cherished. I believe you are good and kind and worthy. I believe that every person, not just some, deserve to be respected and nurtured. That cupid doesn’t have a darn thing on the human heart.

Buddha Balboa loves you. – BB